Transformation or Reinvention?

I have a lot I want to say about these two pictures, but it's hard to concisely put it into words.

On the left, I'm running my very first race (a half marathon!) in 2010. On the right, I'm sitting on my favorite aerial apparatus for a photo shoot a few months ago.

In both pictures, I am something I never in a million years thought I could ever be.

Diagnosed with Ulcerative Colitis in my childhood planted some deep seeds. I grew up feeling like the chronically ill, uncoordinated, and overweight kid. Ultimately, I had two surgeries to remove my large intestine and another emergency surgery due to complications from the previous surgery. Life revolved around my disease. Will my intestines be ok f I eat that? Is that too much stress on my body if I move like that? Its flu season… will be hospitalized for a week like the last time I got the flu? Will that career choice allow me enough bathroom breaks? Where’s the closest hospital if I get sick on vacation? Does that hospital have doctors familiar with my disease?

Growing up I had great friends, did well in school, volunteered a lot, and played piano. I actually did a lot of martial arts growing up. But it was all safe. And I felt stuck. I wanted to do more, be more. But what was more? Where do I even start?

There was a guy I had a crush on growing up. He ran. And he was so cool. I didn’t feel particularly cool, but I also didn’t run. Maybe if I ran, that would be a good first step (pun intended)?

So I ran. I signed up with a half marathon training and fundraising program for Crohn’s and Colitis Foundation. I ended up falling in love with how much grit and persistence I discovered in myself. I loved it so much, all I did was run! I ran over 40 half marathons, 3 full marathons, and various other races here and there. Who am I?! Did I just reinvent myself? What else can I be?

I became a rock climber, an aerialist, a competitive body builder, a fitness trainer, an entrepreneur, a coach… I became an inventor, reinventing myself over and over again. I am still every much that over weight, quirky young woman stoked on life to be running her very first marathon to the experienced and confident (and sexy?! and strong?! and graceful?!) woman on the right just sitting there being. This body is the accumulation of every version of myself leading up to that day. And all those versions are incredible.